Real Talk: Summer 2019

Having sex should not hurt. A healthy sexual relationship between people involves good communication about what you like and don’t like. This is especially true when it’s your first time. You should talk about anything that hurts or feels uncomfortable. You can also use a lubricant to prevent pain that comes from genital dryness. When in doubt, talk with your partner to make having sex an enjoyable and painless experience. And remember, there is absolutely no need to rush into having sex. Do not engage in sexual activity if you don’t feel ready!

Katherine Williams, M.D

Some boys like pornography—and so do some girls! Pornography allows us to see sexual acts that maybe we had only imagined before. Most of us have had imaginary sex scenes in our mind, and pornography is one way to see them come to life, without actually having to do them. Most boys have a higher sex drive than girls so they will imagine sex scenes, and potentially want to watch them, more often than a lot of girls. Girls may be less likely to talk about watching pornography, even if they do like to watch it. It is totally normal to either like to watch pornography or not! If you have a boyfriend who watches pornography, it may make you think that he wants to be with someone other than you. This very often is not the case—they are just turned on by watching some of their fantasies played out.

Nicole Freehill, M.D.

Kissing is a form of showing affection between two people, which involves interlocking your lips with someone else’s. French kissing is basically a more intimate form of kissing with your mouth open that includes using your tongue. There really is no formula for how to kiss, but you and your partner will find a rhythm that is enjoyable for you both. There will probably be some trial and error along the way. The important thing is that you are learning how to experience this with someone you feel comfortable with!

Selamawit Whitfield, M.D.

What do I do about body odor? Body odor is the perceived smell your body gives off when bacteria that live on your skin are broken down by sweat. The smell usually comes from your feet, groin, armpits, genitals, pubic hair and other hair. Body odor is unique to each person and is influenced by diet, gender, health, and medication. Your unique smell may even be pleasant to others. However, if you perceive your smell to be unpleasant, here are some ways to prevent body odor: wash daily with warm water to reduce the bacteria on your skin; wear natural fibers such as cotton or silk that allow sweat to evaporate; use deodorant and antiperspirant. In severe cases, Botox injections or even surgery can be used to reduce the amount of sweat produced by sweat glands. You should see your doctor if your body smells different than usual or if you are sweating more than usual.

Jamie Sias, M.D.

First of all, you are not weird. If binding makes you feel more comfortable in your body, that is okay. Explaining that to your parents may help them understand. There are many different reasons why girls, and women, may bind. These include athletics, costuming, gender dysmorphia, cross-dressing, transgender identification, lactation suppression, wound healing, aesthetics, concealing breast development, and even to help heal from surgery! Whatever your reason, as long as it contributes to a more positive body image of yourself, it is okay. It is important to know that you can hurt yourself or deform breast tissue with overly restrictive binding. To be safe, if you bind, make sure that you use a stretchy material and wear it as loosely as needed to get the look you want. Lastly, don’t bind for more than eight hours at a time.

Ophelia Langhorne, M.D.